Blabbermouth

I thought I could be strong

But I guess I was wrong

That I’m safe and my guesses are perfectly calculated

That I won’t be later instigated

But instead, my mistakes have made me learn to keep quiet and not be stern

Especially when they say oh hey let’s see what you have to say

The truth will always be, that whomever speaks more falls deeper

Deeper and deeper than before

With every word given more

So be careful when you store your lore

And even more when you decide to let it pour

For that stuff has refined like wine

And comes our way more intense than the steady suspense that had built up over time

Did I say too much?

The irony

The only release of my numbness is to ignore my feelings

Because my feelings make me to numb.

Sad and scared, distraught with regret

I’m wondering why

I even said the things I thought

I thought maybe, thoughts should be shared

But I forgot entirely

That thoughts can become things

And things can become dangerous

And I should be brave enough

To fight what my own words create!

My fiend , Fear, and also friend when I am near

As I lie back into the comfort of solace
With eyes closed and enveloped in darkness
I forgot that I’m a visitor to someone sinister
And that this blissful darkness is not my own domain.
Rather Fear dwells deep within the warmth of this depth
Crawling, creeping up to whisper to my heart so crassly
“Do you really think that you can have what you desire- I’ve trained you to want nothing but for you to prosper”

My beautiful friend, my formidable foe, Fear, is a ghost risen from the broken death of tragedy. She forms her words so carefully, all crafted from the pain of past misery. She thinks she’s my teacher and my savior, a priestess who has sought my forgiveness.

But forgiveness for what? I speculate in silence, but in silence or sung aloud,

My thoughts are music to her shrine.

No secrets over here. All is heard quite clear.

“Forgive yourself for foolery! For faltering and fumbling to and fro, from past tragedies! Oh you should know!” She rose, eyes bright with excitement. She thinks shes kind and loving for every syllable in her chastisement.

I fall back, “no. Forgiveness is not imprisonment. This is nothing less of a punishment. You’ve changed the meaning of forgiveness to a cruel way of admonishment. I’m in no need of atonement, there was never any sin in my disdain!

Even if wasn’t innocent,if I don’t persist, then wouldn’t my life become meaningless? I’m now safe and now un-sorry. I’ve found how to face my past folly. I assure you, oh fear , by God I shant fall again.

So please , be my friend and guide me according to sense!
We must oust ourselves of this great suspense, and grow together once again!


And thus, the fiend, Fear, fell silent, defeated yet retreated. She is now my beautiful friend, an advisor once again, and dwells with me in darkness, ready to guide me upon my acquaintance.

She made one last request before I left.
Crept up and calling with humility, “Goodness, can you call me , Wisdom, my dear woman? “

“I sure can” , as I tipped my imaginary hat!

Romance at sunrise

BisMillahirahManirahim

Look, I like you. Not because of your looks as you do me. Not for your charm either, that didn’t swoon me.

Don’t worry, you can’t groom me, by Allah you can’t groom me.

But if you want a life to be closer to Allah swt, then you may choose me.

If you want your kids to be above the people, then you may choose me.

But if you want to live a life of small joys and fun, then you can’t fool me.

Now, for what price can you have me?

I think you’re smart but I want you to be smarter.

You work hard, but you’ll need to work harder.

You live for standards but raise them higher.

Now,

If you desire to live as you wish, then you are free to do so.

As for me, I desire to elevate. Not wish for desires.

self-love

Live in this world to give, then there isn’t much left to hurt you
Live in this world for sacrifice, your expectations will be met.
Live in this world for patience, there’s no room for regret.
Live in this world to serve, your feet will never touch the ground

and perhaps you will find self-love

through perseverance