A secret, intentionally forgotten

Is chivalry a secret?

Silently preserved in the archives of patriarchy

Is a woman’s respect and honor a conspiracy as much as it is a horrid dream
You think you’re being casual but damn it I know what you’re doing

I’m not your bro or broski

It’s a projection to enjoy my reaction and feed yourself

I’m not your friend, I’m a woman with honor and dignity

Because I wouldn’t want anyone else treated like that, regardless of who they are.

Chastity isn’t only on the inside

It’s everything on the outside

Be loyal to yourself, let others be loyal to themselves as well.

Days

But then again, you only live once…

So I will make the most of my days

It’s up to me to find all the ways

God gave me the keys to use them as I please

so please, I say to myself- do not let this consuming darkness

hover over my eyes

It blinds me with lies about myself

telling me my goals are baseless-

That I’m full of holes, so what I do is pointless

But the judgement is in the Future’s hands

Because Time well spent is what really matters,

-Not what I see now in what appears to be a fishless pond

Miracles do happen

And not at a price, except that

I, myself, be the science of it

until I reach the end of the summit

and be the one first to submit

in humility

as success is simply

the first step

in not being lazy

nor being bound to the haze

of all the craze

that seems to revolve

with ease

around your manifest effort

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Motto for Living in a Trump Era

nothing better than getting a healthy dose of the Masjid at times like this( Trump Era) This is what I have to share after listening to a lecture by some really awesome learned scholar phD dude, a brilliant educator of our young Imam.  This isnt all what the lecturer said, rather it’s my reflection and way of relating it to myself.
1) change our focus from falling for our desires, trying to get more of everything we want. more of our distractions, more of the shiny things, more of excess -basically anything -that signifies wealth for you.  the excess. the  extravagance.  the greed.   Be real with yourself and what matters
2) dont let circumstances make you take away your consideration for others. care for others, help others, ponder about others and their pains and how you can be there for them, expand unity beyond your personal borders.


3) bare through it patiently. it’s gonna be hard, scary, and ugly but we have to be our best especially in this time. no matter how much you wanna go off on someone, you gotta play it cool bc that’s what will hit the hardest if you wanna win. cuz the point of this all is that you wanna win and you cant win without controlling yourself and being humble

Contemplation

Oh Allah I used to cry to you all the time
Until you dried my tears away
but then just as my eyes became dry
so did my heart
because when I’d moisten my eyes with my tears
so would my heart remain moist

and despite the tears of sadness
I’d find through the rivers
cooling streams
giving my reluctance security
giving my shyness integrity

yet, now I’m treading on my own path

using my imagination to lay down bricks

that make their turns on rifts

 

Oh Lord, turn these scorched roads

into meandering runoffs

that lead to secret gardens

and profused abodes

before my heart completely hardens

and becomes spitefully zesty with nothing more than

ugly scoffs

 

 

So I pray to my bewildernment
as I sit hear with my hands up high
begging for my eyes to never dry
lest these amateur paths my hands pry

crumble nigh without knowing why

 

 

Hypocrisy in all honesty

Tired of all the hypocrisy
Im happier to be alone
Because when I see the world in front of me
It all seems like doom and gloom
Where are all the good people
That know how to be true
True in their words
And genuine in their smiles
True on others’ worth
And humble in their trials

The world seems to be racing
Despite the universe  simply tracing
Back on their orbits
We spend our time stalking and pacing
Welling up our jealousy
As we silently, cruelly, fight each other to bits
Life has turned into a competition
A time that Darwin could only cry about
But there’s no proof needed anymore
When half of life is drowning in its own blood and dying in misery

aside from all the horror

I do believe there is an opening

a chance to find a haven

instead of being swept by my biased reckoning

because as long as the birds keep chirping

and the clouds keep raining

I do think

I can find the end to

my own meaning

 

With the Light of no source

behind the curtains
above these windows
with not a single star in sight
there gazes a certain light
belonging to no source
despite the thundering plight
ringing against my ears
bringing me to tears

I’m fighting for my sake
because my purpose is all I have
far away from the regular world
swarmed by the stories that are lived as untold
It’s not the material I desire to take
and rub it into my hands
pretending it won’t turn to dust
nor is it the lust
that bewitches hearts to rust

rather it’s what dries away my tears
the cool wind thriving through my years
guiding me to the light
I was sure was ever real
helping me see myself
above the petty things
that were grown with crooked wings
failing me to fly
to the greatest height of one’s sight
no
I see myself
above those petty things
grown with crooked wings
above the lavish
that seizes to quench the thirst of gluttonous eyes

I see myself rise,
not needing the sugar in the lies-

nor the endless tales in ties-

I see myself

going

towards the heaviest in size, succulent clouds
with rain drops
of no owner shared
ready to give
to that which is none unless paired

so here I am
behind these dark curtains
listening to the lightning
with no stars in sighting
having the one thing
that is the world’s most heightened
glory, with the wind keeping my secrets

to myself