A threshold past the heavens

are you catching on
are you catching onto how each cloud reflects the sky in its own view
bringing color and form in every possible hue
are you catching onto how each cloud gives the sky purpose

and how the sky finds purpose with the clouds
and that we see the final scene
with all of it’s everlasting depth and beauty

are you catching onto how this scenery is the secret to all we yearn
that it’s all we need to learn
every breeze plows the clouds apart
fashioning each strobe most delicately through the horizon
there’s wisdom in every whispered wonder in whatever cloud that descends a little lower than usual

do you see the magnitude before your eyes
what is arrogance
what is pride
what is ownership
when that which is beyond us
is past our bewilderment

what little is left
but love
something we can acquire

a threshold of its own
a bridge that leads to further discovery
creating beauty from all the past and misery
as the sun sets away last of it’s days fusing light
to fall in love with the moon
and enlighten another path
that can only be seen in the night
and each star to twinkle us through time until we set again

and again, and again.

for us to find a reason to smile again,

and again.

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Immaterial heaven of my living self

I will wait in patience 

Until that which was unknown becomes apparent

And until prayers and destiny reach their verdict

 no rush, I’m happy as I am.
Unfortunately what’s best is that time be taken for clarity

For both cases to be solved and given their due burials

 And toss away our last living flowers of the past into it’s casket for cremation

After all, this ambiguity is well-wishing. Although it leaves huge gaping holes in my heart, I must accustom myself to the ice cool breeze willowing through this freshly carved cave

Perhaps one day it’ll become as magnificent and jeweled as the worlds oldest caves.

It’ll become my castle, my sanctuary of ever flowing hopes and dreams. Pure tears from the valley of my eyes, furnishing mirrored stalagmites of sincere desires.

Reflecting the years of sabr  

and dedication, and the serene streams of honesty meandering through and through.

This is my artwork, this is my treasure, which no eye has seen.

And it’s all carefully crafted by my patience, sincerity, and destiny.

This is the immaterial heaven of my living self.

The throne of my mind-palace. 

How long

For how long will my father be stolen from me

For how long will I be bereaved of my king

For how long will I only retain memory of his kindness, and let my eyes be soaked with sadness

My father, my provider, the most well-meaning being I know

raising me with nothing but hugs and kisses

showing me his love for animals and bird houses

teaching me to speak well, and love.

growing up, I had only tried to care for him

but his mental illness, his simplicity for life had abducted me from security.

I grew up with little integrity and dignity

Hiding from the embarrassment

that my father cannot be seen as normal.

From birth, to even now a past marriage, he is still not mine yet

He’s still away from me.

He’s close in my heart

but these years have me distraught.

22 years, and i’m still struggling to give him the best

to give the best of what any father deserves

which is why it kills me that

the only rest he can really have

is his final one

and nobody else can see that but us.

it is all invisible

 

I am human, but I love.

Show me kindness

Move my heart

I am a coward

Who has not yet flowered.

Am I brave enough to breath through black smoke of the fire in my ties,

maybe so.

and I am a coward.

Look at me with more than just your eyes

I am a coward, but when the moment strikes I’ll reel though the heat of midday summer without surrendering.

I won’t give up from losing, I won’t stoop low if I reach my prime

but I’ll remain a coward,

with sometimes courage, sometimes strength,

and sometimes fear.

show me kindness

move my heart

for you,

I’ll stand for you, dear.

A universe in yourself

Beautiful, benign, and benevolent

graceful, divine, and genuine

Flaws and all, you’re a concoction of perfection

the cosmic radiance in each beat of your heart

the endless galaxies in your eyes that can see more than art

Your life, your wishful soul- a personality that none other can capture

All that lulls and dulls, it’s just the ingredients for you to retain claim of yourself

Forgetful, messy,

quirky and dressy

These are your traits that help you be free.

We are all games for ourselves, we’re all perfect in who we are

it’s just that we must keep up with these traits

and continue to discover what else is in our plates.

As we open more gates and face our fates

it’s then that our turn is ours to roll

the dice  that is in our own control

it’s our choice to remain perfect

and it’s our choice to regress in defect

So what will it be?  Mark a tally of hate on our slate

or a mark of congruence and continuation

in our growth and perfect

creation?

 

 

 

 

Tethering Scars

lend your broken hand for it’ll become whole faster

since there is no better healing

then to give your heart to those

who’ve been rigged from feeling

 

Become the open arms

that everyone refused to you

so you’ll know that you’re worth the while

than what the past

lies to be true

 

Charge at your trial with dominance

and you’ll love and cherish the moments that pass by

For without them, you won’t hear yourself cry

in gratitude